Again?...

If I don't start expressing myself again then I will not survive this next few months. I was told by a friend and relative that they missed my blog. Here you are! I will try again for me and for you. I will be completely honest though and that is my only disclaimer. If this is for me then it will really be for me. Not for the reader. I love to write, but often don't let myself do so because of the labels I put on it: I don't want others to be because it is not good enough, or I don't have to time right now because... You get the picture. 

I write because it makes me feel whole. When I was a lot younger I used to carry notebook after notebook with me so that I could have that release. I stopped that because of the labels I started to put on my life. I still need that release, but have turned to other things such as Dr. pepper and over loading myself with so much to do that I can't breathe let alone take care of myself. Even now as I am typing this I feel the pressing need to cry because for the first time in a long time I feel like I am being honest with myself.

So, here I am. Being honest!