Necessary and Contingent

Not only have a been thinking about this for my philosophy class but also for what to bring to Maryland. At first there was a huge pile of books in the 'I must take'. Now I have all the my books in one box. Looking around I think of things I just need to get rid of. Think in the perspective," what can I put in the back of my Kia?" Thinking this way has helped in the elimination process!
What an odd thought of us leaving. Maybe not leaving Arizona as much as leaving the West. I can honestly say I never would have dreamed of us moving to the little 'zit' on the US called Maryland. Idaho I would have expected. Or even Oregon wouldn't have been a huge surprise. No. We are moving to a state that is smaller then I can see on the map without my glasses. The best part is that there is more art there then I can even dream of. Do you know that New York is only a few hours away, and that that is where Chihulys studio is!? Not to mention that the Smithsonian and hour or less away.
I will always love AZ but it has been time past due for us to leave.

Raise a Glass

This blog has been a journal for me for a very long time. It has helped me to think about what I say before it comes out..most of the time! All my hard times I haven't written about. Maybe that is why I haven't written for a while. Maybe that is why I haven't written for most of the year. One thing that has struck me the last few days though is that I am not immortal. I can't recover faster than is necessary. I can't think that I can go without sleep for days! I can try all I want but when it comes down to it: I am still messed up. I am not trying as hard as I should because I am afraid of my emtions half the time. I can't save the world. I need to start with me.
I have to pretend that I am ok sometimes. Who doesn't do that?! But putting off feeling does nothing but give you tumors. that one I know by experience. I have felt angry at my body for that off and on for a year now. that isn't right to my body. No one should beat them selves up for something that happens that the doctors can't even explain. It is mroe then time for me to let go!
I know it won't be easy but I know that I need to or I will hurt more from something similar in the future.
I am moving to Maryland. I don't know how to feel about that. I like to call it the zit on the US. I am scared to death! Arizona is my home. I know that I need to go though. This is the best thing that can happen and I need to take it with open arms.
So here is my toast. Here is to my adventure! no matter where I go, no matter who I am with, I will look for new experiences!
~Chy